"I can’t fall in love yet, I’m only 16."
— Asking Jan if he’s in love with my friend
Tagged as: qotd
About
I'm Elizabeth. People call me Liz and some teachers at my school even call me The Eliminator. Respect. I have many aliases. I could be that little Mexican man near that bus stop down the street of your house. I like pretending to speak French. What up, baguette, Eiffel Tower, croissant. No, I'm not bisexual and I don't even want to know what a pansexual is. Do those people only like pans. I don't know. What am I saying.
I, Elizabeth, bid you hello!
You don't know me,
though you may have heard of me,
but that's not the point.
Long story short...
I need help.
Tumblr Trading Hours:
I'm usually active from Monday to Thursday. Friday to Sunday, I'm working or busy feeding my cats. I lied, I don't have cats.
Meta
During English,
Sir: Hey, did you guys hear about that actress that got stabbed the other day?
Us: WHO?!
Sir: I don’t know… it was “Reese” something….
Student: Reese Witherspoon?
Sir: No, with a knife.
Tagged as: MY ENGLISH CLASS IS FILLED WITH EPIC LULZ qotd
"Whitney Houston sent me some roses the other day, but they were dead when they got here."
— My careers advisor (via breakfastatbrittanys)
Tagged as: mr ford gmh qotd
My friend, Dean.
Me: Dean, weren’t you paying attention?
Dean: I’m sorry, I don’t have enough money to pay attention.
Me:
Tagged as: qotd
Today,
Tyler: What does “swag” even mean?
Brittany: Something We Asians Have. OHHHHHH!!!
[puts hand up for hi-five, nobody does]
Tyler: That would be SWAH.
Brittany: ….Oh.
Tagged as: qotd breakfastatbrittanys
We were learning about drugs and alcohol today,
And my teacher asked, “Okay, if a guy in a club tries to sell you this little white pill for $5, what would you do? Would you take it?” The class shakes their heads while saying “No.”
But my friend Mohammad answered, “I only would if I could bargain it for $3.”
Tagged as: qotd
Talking to my friend about that hot chick on Letters and Numbers.
Me: Have you met that girl from Letters and Numbers?
(We were at the university she attends)
Dean: She’s on my to-do list.
Me: You mean… meeting her is on your to-do list or… just her?
Dean: Both.
Tagged as: qotd
Me yelling at Brittany to get off Tumblr while I was on the phone with her.
Me: GET OFF THE COMPUTER.
Brittany: I SWEAR TO GOD I AM!
[a couple of minutes later]
Brittany: Ugh, there’s nothing good on Tum— uh, I mean… not the computer…
yeah nice save bro
Tagged as: qotd
"Lady Gaga has a vagina! I’ve seen it!"
— My friend in response to my other friend saying Lady Gaga is a hermaphrodite
Tagged as: qotd
1 of 6
»
